Listening and JOY

A couple of weeks ago I experienced a time of more intense listening. The idea of listening as a spiritual discipline came to mind. I found it very hard to hold back, I so enjoy talking and I certainly have to pray against pride. Listening is fun, though, when it is intentional. I spend time with one of our precious girls at Hope and we had a time of reading the Bible and praying together. Our reading time was mainly reading and letting her comment - I told her I only wanted to listen. She is very wise for her age and I totally loved some of her comments. When we prayed we enjoyed just some silence. We were sitting at Jacob's Dream on ACU campus and we could hear the sound of the water and the birds. It was wonderful and a great memory we now share. The same week I read the next chapter in Sacred Parenting entitled Seizing Heaven - How Raising Children Teaches us to Listen to God. Not an accident that something on listening came my way. I love the way God puts experiences together for us.

Verses shared in this chapter include:

Listen and understand. (Matthew 15:10)

He who has ears to hear, let him hear. (Mark 4:9)

Again Jesus called the crowd to him and said, ‘Listen to me, everyone and understand this.’(Mark 7:14)

Consider carefully how you listen. (Luke 8:18)

Listen carefully to what I am about to tell you, (Luke 9:44)

My sheep listen to my voice. (John 10:27)

Gary L. Thomas says, "Listening to God provides the true test of our humility. Humble people listen; prideful people never seem to have the time to wait on God."

The next chapter is on JOY. It taught a lesson that I also learned from Calm My Anxious Heart. Think about the two most often requests you have for your children -- Protect them and Change them .... is that true in your prayer life? Well, Gary Thomas suggest a third request. Prayers of thankfulness. They have a way of putting life in perspective. Praying for only protection and change has the emphasis on fear and their weakness. As we put into practice thanking God for His work in their lives, thanking Him for the progress they are making, thanking Him for who our children are (their strengths) then the mind set is very different.

This whole chapter is about JOY and how God wants us to not be so serious. I love the sense of humor Daniel has added to our family. I'm way to serious and need too read the verses about JOY more often!!

Guilt

The third chapter in Sacred Parenting is about guilt. Something that just comes along with our fallen humanity!!

William Sullivan ~

"There is in repentance this great mystery--that we may fly fastest home on broken wing."

Psalm 38:4 My guilt overwhelmed me like a burden too heavy to bear.

Gary L.Thomas, the author points out how Samuel was a faithful servant and yet had sons who did not walk with God, and then he also points out Kings Ahaz and Asa who fell from God's favor and yet had sons, Jehoshaphat and Hezekiah, who were faithful servants. He reminds us we are "not raising robots; we are shepherding image bearers of the Creator God who live with freedom of choice, their own wills, and a personal responsibility of their own."

There are some good things about guilt if we will allow God to work in our lives.
1. Guilt can point us to God
2. Guilt can motivate us to do better
3. Guilt can remind us of God's providence
4. Guilt can teach us to love mercy (my favorite)
5. Guilt has a positive "hidden agenda"

The picture of God that Gary Thomas gives at the end of the chapter was precious and reminded me that my picture of how God parents me affects how I look at my own parenting. That picture of who God is becomes so important as we live out our lives in the Way!!

Sacred Parenting

Walking around at a local flea market I stumbled across a book I have been wanting to purchase. Sacred Parenting by Gary L. Thomas. I read one of his other books, Sacred Marriage awhile back. This author really makes me think.

As I read the first chapter, I asked Daniel, "Why did we decide to have children?" We laughed because we weren't really trying to have a child when Alison came around so Daniel's reply was, "We didn't, God put all of that in motion!" So why did we have another child?? As I read this first chapter, Gary L. Thomas says as God's people he feels having children is not about us but all about Him. He goes on to say, "We are called to bear and raise children for the glory of God." Now if you believe that statement, then it really makes a difference when parenting gets difficult.

The context of II Corinthians 7:1 isn't parenting, but Thomas thinks it is helpful in parenting.

"Dear friends, let us purify ourselves from everything that contaminates body and spirit, perfecting holiness out of reverence for God."

Thomas continues, "Christian parenting is truly a sacred journey. It invites us parents to purify ourselves, to use the process of raising kids to perfect holiness, and to do this consistently, every day, out of reverence for God. If we enter it armed with this understanding, each segment will gain new meaning and purpose -- even the difficult ones."

You may ask yourself why do you do all that you do for your child? If the answer is just for the joy or for the proud moments in our children's lives then that will not last for long. Another Thomas quote that I pondered and talked with Daniel about was this...."to pin our hope and joy on the response of a sinner (our children)in his or her toddler years or teen years is to beg for disillusionment and to risk waking up in despair." We must have a higher calling than our own hope or joy, it must be out of reverence for God. Good read and that was just the first chapter.

Chapter 2 - The Hardest Hurt of All..."Sunshine without rain is the recipe for a desert."

Raising children teaches so much. We build character and we hit serving dead in the face. Letting our children struggle through challenges forms and matures them. It is just so hard, though, to watch. Many times we step ahead and fix it and our children lose out on the experience God has meant to shape them for the future He has planned for them. We make the journey harder when we are chasing our tail trying to make it easier. A good question for us to ask is what do we want for our children as they grow up -- comfort or character. This book is helping me see we must choose service and character over the pain-free life. Do you really think we are helping our children when we coddle them and let them avoid hard experiences? It has been so very hard for Daniel and I to watch the girls struggle with things, but we have mentors that have helped us, encouraged us to let them walk through disappointments. I have never wanted my immaturity to handicap them, although I know I have struggled with this. God has been very merciful to them and us!! I do believe that God sees His kingdom more important than our children's personal comfort. The author encourages you to ask your children as they grow, "What do you think your daddy and mommy feel most passionate about?" They serve as our heart's mirror in a way, Gary Thomas suggests. As we become parents it is interesting to ask what would God do as a parent in this situation? God let His Son suffer because there was a bigger picture. There are some values that are more important than our happiness and comfort.

At the end of chapter 2, the author says, "Sacred parenting calls me to accept the hardest hurt of all -- for the sake of God's kingdom and for the sake of our children's own development. I need to allow my kids to face challenges, failure, rejection and pain, and then teach them to use these seemingly negative events to fuel their sense of mission and to foster their dependence on God."

Missions

I think it gets in your blood!!! Well, there is just an excitement to hear about the next mission team that the A&M church of Christ is supporting during their training year. Joy for Daniel and I that we are in Abilene now that the mission teams train with the Halbert Institute located at ACU.

The Concepcion Team (Deanna Meredith, Wesley and Ellen Shutt, Sara and Chad Lukkason) came over last night minus one of the couples (Reid and Meredith Overall). We talked from 6:30pm-10:00pm at least. We love hearing their thoughts and know from having Alison and Justin's experiences that they will learn so much about themselves and about God through this journey.

They will train until January 2011 and Lord willing will fly to their new homes in Chile. They are each looking for support so as you pray remember them. This is a faith-building experience as you contact congregations and talk with people about supporting your financial needs. If any of you out there have a missions committee looking for missionaries to support, contact this group.

We are doing well. I enjoyed a few days in Tulsa with Hannah. She will really miss Tulsa when she moves. She has made a home for herself there in the two years she has attended University of Tulsa. On Monday, Mar 1, she begins her last seven weeks of interning in a rehab center. She is thinking this is the direction she will begin to look for a job in DC. She has been with a school district since January. Can't wait -- I know she will be a beautiful bride, God has blessed her in so many ways!!

Abilene Snow

Isn't this what everyone in Abilene is doing? Downloading their snow pictures and posting them!! We were in Lima when the last snow came to Abilene so today was fun for us.

Daniel got to come home around noon and we have totally enjoyed a day of relaxation. We are ready for this everyday!! Having Daniel home everyday not the snow...



Cele enjoyed the snow!! We also had a special visit from Phil Grassie, Jason's dad. Phil and Patti live in New Mexico so it was quite a treat to be able to sit and visit. They were missionaries in Brazil and so we were able to listen to some missionary stories!! Great fun!! We love getting to know the parents of the young man who will be Hannah's life partner. God is just so good!!



Looking out our front door!!

Bible Warriors

Grant Parker, Maddie Parker, Rebecca Lopez, Allie Lopez and Samantha Istre

Daniel and I teach the Hope Bible Warriors (3-6th graders). There are about six students that come every Wed. night. This spring we are going through some OT stories. Since our bldg does not have an oven we decided to have the kids come to our house for Bible class last Wednesday. We wanted to make unleavened banana bread. We had been talking about the Passover and the escape from Egypt that the Israelites made. We enjoyed singing and playing and reading and cooking. It really opened up a new opportunity to enjoy them on another level. Enjoy the pictures!!

Pondering With the Lord

The weather was just too wonderful to not get out today, well, this afternoon. I got into my walking clothes and headed out to restart my way back to running. I began speaking out loud to God immediately, almost like it was going to burst out. I confessed a mistake that I should have figured out at least nine years ago. Peace came immediately and I know that I am forgiven. I'm such a slow learner, but I am determined that I have learned it this time!! My walk was short as my plan has it that way. 15 min. brisk walk is my next step!!

As I came in, Daniel had the radio on and Focus on the Family was interviewing Robert and Bobbie Wolgemuth and their two adult daughters. (scroll down on the page to listen) The interview was about the parenting of their two daughters and about Robert's book, She calls me Daddy. I decided I wanted to just sit and listen to the 20 min. interview. I found myself tearing up - so many memories as I listened. Daniel and I had so many of the same feelings that were projected in this interview. What a joy to be parents, determined not to hand off the job of parenting to anyone else, a mix of love and discipline, listening to music and singing in the car...we definitely enjoyed the ride. It was also very hard and there were many prayers and mistakes we made. I'm overwhelmed by the love God gives in my heart for my girls. I know there are many parents out there that have experienced the same. How can we understand the deep love of the Father? We understand just a bit by being parents!!





One of the activities the woman of Hope (our church community) does is tell the feeling of our hearts at our weekly gatherings. My friend, Chelsa, uses the word SASHET, and each letter stands for a feeling(sad, angry, sacred, happy, excited, and tender). That is a beginning point, but we can use any word to describe where our heart is at that point. It has been very helpful for us to gain insight as to where we each are. Earlier in the week I told her my heart was feeling very dependent on God and today, as we gathered for our Friday lunch at the building, I felt relaxed in the Lord (even though my circumstances aren't all at peace). That is what I told God as I walked today, even though I made a mistake, I will confess and move on. My heart is still going to be relaxed!! Try this with some of your friends, it has been quite helpful and fun!!